Recap for 23 Av 5776 (Parsha Eikev)

This Shabbos, Rabbi Males spoke about the commandment to love thy fellow Jews, regardless of where they are in their life journey. He mentioned, in particular, welcoming and helping newcomers to the community. Norm shared that he appreciates the welcoming and help he received when his family came hear following hurricane Katrina. I appreciate that I have always felt welcome by everyone, especially when I was a newcomer and very early in my journey back to my religion.

I want to thank Rob Golder for hosting our Kiddush and learning this week. We discussed some interesting questions and issues. Rob Golder led discussion.

We discussed the practice of bringing out Sefer Torahs during Sukkot. In particular, we discussed how on the 7th day, some shuls bring out as many Torahs as they have, but usually no more than 7. We discussed how we circle the shul with these Torahs.

We discussed the origin of the 3 tefillah services, Shacharit, Mincah, and Mariiv. There are 2 sources. The first source comes from the patriarchs, with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, who prayed at these times. These patriarchs, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, correspond to Shacharit, Mincah, and Mariiv, respectfully. The second source is the sacrifices, which we now replace with prayer. These were done during the morning, afternoon, and evening.

We discussed how the patriarchs, do not account for Mussaf, and how the sacrifices do not account for Mariiv.  We discussed how we use a combination of these sources, to come up with the 3 prayer services, plus Mussaf, which is known as the additional prayer. We discussed how we only repeat the Amidah part of Mariiv once, because it is only indicated by 1 out of the 2 sources.

We discussed the practice of doing Mincah/Mariiv early, in particular during the summer. We are allowed to bring in the new day early by 1.5 hours. The definition of these "hours" is 1 "hour" equal to 1/12th the total daylight hours of the day. We discussed that if we bring in the new day early, we should be consistent.

We discussed how during the summer, it is common to bring in Shabbos early by amounts that are less than 1.5 hours. We discussed that there is opinion that this is allowed, as long as we would not get a minyan earlier, and/or there are people who could not get to the earlier minyan.

We discussed that it is not problematic to do business with Christians, as they have a monotheistic religion and moral values. It is ok for Christians to not follow all of our halakah, but as Jews we are commanded, and have a covenant, to do so.

This is a summary of what we discussed.  No halachic rulings are intended or should be inferred.

Recap for 16 Av 5776 (Parsha Va’etchanan)

This Shabbos we continued our discussion of Torah v’Derech Eretz, including commentary from Leo Levy’s book. We discussed Parsha Va’etchanan, including commentary from Rav Yeager's book. Norm gave a brief summary of his talk on PTSD. This was a special Shabbos, as we welcome and wish Mozel Tov to Ariav and Ale. David Schlesinger led discussion.

Last week, we discussed how just like the moon grows full and disappears, the temple was constructed and destroyed. We discussed how when machgiah comes the temple will be rebuilt, however the moon will continue its cycle.  There is a Mishnah we were discussing that uses the moon as a metaphor, however, this was not clearly stated in these notes, so I wish to clarify this.

We continued our discussion of Torah v’Derech Eretz. We studied from Leo Levy’s book, and discussed the obligations parents have in raising children, to teach them a trade, and put them into position to find a spouse.

We discussed from Leo Levy’s book, how faith in Hashem plays a role in determining the results of our work. We discussed that if we do not believe in Hashem, we are pretty much on our own and completely in control of our results. However, if we do believe in Hashem, once we have done our part, Hashem determines the results and provides for us.  We discussed how what many of us consider the “luck factor”, may actually be that which is determined by Hashem, when we believe in him.

We discussed from Leo Levy’s book the balance we have between Torah study and work. Although we may spend more time engaged in work, we should consider Torah Study “kevah”, permanent, and our work temporary. We should set aside a set time for Torah study every day and make a commitment to do it, even if something else comes up. Work, on the other hand, is thought of as "temporary", but not necessarily of less importance, or something we should engage in less often.  Work in and of itself is of value and part of Hashem’s will for us. Ale commented that what is important is to have a state of mind that Torah study is of a permanent nature.

We discussed the difference between permanent and temporary with respect to the halakah of putting up a mezuzah. We are required to put up a mezuzah within 30 days that we take up a permanent residence. However, we are not required to put up a mezuzah for temporary residencies such as hotel rooms. Efroni commented that the 30 days is how long we have to put up the mezuzah, but has nothing to do with whether or not a mezuzah needs to be put up. If we expect a residence to be permanent, such as moving into a house, we are required to put up a mezuzah within 30 days.

We discussed the ordering of the questions we are asked upon arrival in Olam HaBah. We are first asked if we faithfully engaged in work. Then we are asked if we set aside time for Torah study. We discussed that the questions are ordered like this, to show that we work so that we can engage in Torah study. If we didn’t work, we would not be able to engage in Torah study at all, as we would be constantly looking for others to provide for us.

Norm shared with us a summary of his upcoming talk on PTSD. Norm shared that PTSD involves going through tragedy, and that it can drastically change our life. These changes include how we think about the world, and changes to our ability to feel emotions, which includes numbing. Norm spoke on how avoiding the issues is not a healthy way to deal with them, and what is often therapeutic is to set aside time for emotional processing during planned periods of time. Norm spoke about how PTSD often affects soldiers who fight wars, but can also affect any of us who have been through tragedy, and that there are treatments available for this condition.

This Shabbos we discussed parsha Va’etchanan, including commentary by Rav Yeager. We discussed how in the parsha, Moshe foretells what will happen to the Jewish people. Dave W commented that everything Moshe foretells has come true, including our return to the promise land realized since Israel became a state in 1948.

We discussed why the Torah often mentions the Exodus from Egypt, but does not mention the receiving of the Torah as often. We discussed that prior to being told about the receiving of the Torah, we are reminded of the importance of the information.

We discussed the differences between optimism and pessimism. Pessimism means when things are good we think they are going to get bad. Optimism means that when things are bad, we consider them temporary bumps along the road, and that the overall picture is good. We discussed the importance of focusing on the big picture in our lives, and not letting bumps in the road throw us off course.

Ariav spoke about how Moshe grew up outside of Israel, in an Egyptian family, however, later became a great leader of the Jewish people. He spoke about how this is similar to how he himself and his siblings were born and grew up outside of Israel.

We discussed some more this Shabbos, how Hashem chooses to remain hidden, in order that we may keep our free will. However, when we were a lot “younger” as a nation, Hashem’s presence was a lot more obvious. Today, we are expected to be “grown up”, which is why the rewards and punishments we receive are not as immediate.  

This is a summary of what we discussed.  No halachic rulings are intended or should be inferred.

Recap for 9 Av 5776 (Parsha Vayikra)

On Tuesday, we held a siyum in honor of Efroni finishing another tractate of the Talmud. On Shabbos, we continued our discussion of Torah v’Derech Eretz. We discussed Parsha Vayikra, including commentary by Rav Yeager. And we discussed the observance of Tisha B’Av. David Schlesinger led discussion.

The siyum was held on Tuesday in celebration of Efroni's accomplishment of finishing the in depth study of a full tractate. Although the siyum was held during the 9 days, we were able to enjoy many types of meat which were very nicely barbecued.  Efroni gave a dvar Torah, and shared when and why it is appropriate to have a siyum and eat meat during the 9 days. Since it has always been our habit and custom to have Siyums all year around, and not just during the 9 days, we can have one during the 9 days.  

We continued our discussion of Derech Eretz, which we define as the “ways of the world”. These "ways of the world" includes all the physical laws, and how we use these to participate in the act of creation and perform work. We discussed how regardless of our need to do work, there is a minimum amount of Torah study we should engage in. There are 2 Opinions on exactly how much this minimum is. One opinion is that the minimum amount is simply to say the Shma in the morning and evening. The other opinion is that the minimum and maximum Torah learning is the same, and is equal to as much as we can do, with limited exceptions for other activities, such as work. 

We discussed that we should not engage in lengthy secular study, that takes away from Torah study, just to have a profession that enables us to make a lot of money. However, if we are very passionate about a certain career, and have good reason to believe that it is our calling to pursue this, then we should pursue it, although it would mean less Torah study for us.

We discussed how in the parsha, we are told that we spent many years travelling a distance that was only 11 days away. We are told this, in order to remind us that we could have entered Israel much sooner. We discussed how Moshe recalls the broader reason why he was unable to enter Israel, which is because as leader he was responsible to get us ready to enter the land, which we were not.

Regardless of what happened, we discussed how the messages we were receiving at the time were much more oriented towards the future than dwelling on the past.  This is a lesson for us today, that rather than dwell on the past so much we should focus on the future which is something we have the power to change.

We discussed an analogy that Moshe was like the sun, and Joshua who would be taking over as leader, was like the moon. We discussed how, unlike the sun, the moon grows larger and smaller. We discussed that the temple being built and destroyed, follows a pattern similar to the moon. We discussed how when mashgiah comes, the moon will always be at full size, and the temple will always stand without any more destructions.

We discussed the observance of Tisha B’Av that gets pushed off by one day, as the 9th of Av falls on Shabbos. We discussed that we can have a Brit on Tisha B’Av, however no one is allowed to have a meal during the day with one exception. The exception is, that if there is a brit on Tisha B’Av, and Tisha B’Av is observed on the 10th, then the Mohel, Sandak, and father are allowed to have a meal during the day.

We discussed the reasons why we can not just go and rebuild the temple. Rob shared that there are practical as well as Torah reasons. The practical reasons include not wanting to start a major war. The Torah reasons include our making of vows that would prohibit us from rebuilding the temple at this time.

This is a summary of what we discussed.  No halachic rulings are intended or should be inferred.

Recap for 2 Av 5776 (Parsha Matot-Masseit)

This Shabbos we continued our discussion of Torah v’Derech Eretz. We discussed Parshas Matot and Masseit. We discussed observance of Tisha B’Av, including the 9 day period. And we discussed the topic of human memory. I would like to thank David and Linda for hosting our Kiddush and Learning, and Zev Samuels, a regular reader of these notes, for hosting a later Kiddush at Anshei. David Schlesinger led discussion.

We discussed from Leo Levy’s book, how we live within the confines of the physical world, and should not pray for miracles that would necessitate divine intervention, once something has been determined. One of the examples we discussed, is that once the sex of a baby is determined we should not pray for the child to be born a baby boy or baby girl. An all-powerful God can of course change the sex of a baby, but we should not pray for this to happen. Another example we discussed, if the fire trucks are on the way to a neighborhood to put out a fire, we should not pray for it not to be our house, since the house has already been determined.  

If we are not sure whether or not something has been determined, we can pray for it. Harold Katz, a regular reader of these notes, told me they were not sure whether or not his wife was pregnant on Rosh Hashanah, but prayed for a boy, regardless, after already having 2 girls. Coincidentally, the Haftorah at the time was about Hannah who was also praying for a child. Thanks to Hashem, like in the Haftorah, the Katz were able to have a boy.

We discussed that even if something has not been determined, we cannot live our life relying on prayer and miracles. We must do our part, to the best of our ability, to carry out Hashem’s will for us, follow the Torah, and help finish the act of creation by doing work as we are discussing in our Torah v’Derech Eretz class. If we do our part, Hashem will do his. But we cannot rely on Hashem, we must take action ourselves.

This Shabbos, David shared from his father, Harav Nattan Ben Harav Shmuel , that we remember things that have meaning to us. I personally can remember my Barmitzvah, and where I was and with whom on 9/11. However, I cannot remember what I was doing a day, week, or month after these events.

This Shabbos we discussed the parsha and the importance of vows. We discussed how when we make a vow, it rises up to the importance of a Torah level commandment. We discussed how Hashem and others rely on our vows. One of the interesting examples we discussed, is the case of a person who vows to fast in order to save someone else's life. If the life ends up being saved, the person who made the vow still has to fast.  Hashem saves lives with the expectation that vows will be carried out.

Rob shared how we can sometimes get out of a vow, however this requires an appearance in front of a special court that may no longer be operating today. Perhaps someone can testify that if he was aware of certain facts he would not have made the vow, and the court will relieve him of the vow. There are also cases where a spouse can cancel the vows of the other spouse, and where parents can cancel the vows of their children. It is best to be very careful making vows, and to always include a “way out”, by including phrases such as “god willing”.

We discussed the great importance of speech in general. It is of utmost importance to be honest, as Hashem and others rely on what we say. It is also important to not say negative things about others – LaShan Hara. David shared from his father a story in which a person lets others know of someone’s dishonest indirectly, in order to avoid saying LaShan Hara. He describes the dishonest person as having such a good memory, he remembers things that didn’t occur.

We discussed how speech is how we differ from other animals. We discussed how speech reflects our character, and how our character is shaped by our speech. We discussed how the best way to improve our character is to start off with changing our behavior, which includes our speech.

We discussed T’sha B’av. The observance of this day reminds us that we have not accepted the status quo of not having a temple and being dispersed out into the diaspora. We discussed that perhaps this is the most important holiday for a secular Jew to observe. We discussed some of the customs we have as part of mourning, such as not shaving, getting haircuts, and taking baths, however there may be exceptions to these so it is important to speak to a Rabbi. On the day of T’sha B’av we fast, if we are medically able to do so.  We should discuss any fast with our doctor and rabbis.

This is a summary of what we discussed.  No halachic rulings are intended or should be inferred.