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Sunday, November 9, 2014

Recap for 15 Chesvan, 5775 (Parsha Vayeira)


This Shabbos David Schlesinger led discussion. We began by discussing how this week’s parsha is similar and different to last week’s parsha.  In both parshas Abraham presents Sarah as his sister.  In this week’s parsha this is done with Avimelech, and in last week’s parsha this is done with Pharaoh. Abraham does this in order to protect his own life.  He does not want to be seen as a threat to the leaders who may desire his wife.

In his dvar torah, Efroni Schlesinger discusses some of the differences between the parshas. Abraham tells Avimelech that he has no reverence of God.  However, Abraham says nothing to Pharaoh.  Efroni comments that perhaps Pharaoh already has a fear of God and does not need to be told.  Efroni comments that Avimelech simply took Sarah without even checking whether she was available, whereas Pharaoh made more of an effort to proceed cautiously.  Efroni also comments that Hashem had to tell Avimelech more directly not to take Sarah, whereas with Pharaoh he came across as more aware of the consequences of his actions.

There is the opposite position, however. David presented this opposite position that perhaps Pharaoh simply isn’t ready to be told about God and Avimelech is. There is a life lesson to this, in that we need to be ready to receive Torah and spirituality, whether directly through Hashem, or through other people. If we turn our back on Hashem, we may be “beyond” receiving anything.

Efroni goes on in his commentary, to suggest that Avraham is also saving Sarah’s life by not telling her of the plan to be his sister with respect to Avimelech. If Sarah knows what is going on, she could be committing adultery which is punishable by death. However if she does not know, she technically would not be considered guilty of this. However, Efroni comments that although technically we may not commit an avera, it can still be considered quite wrong what we do. For example, if our wife tells us she doesn’t like a cigarette in our mouth, technically we can remove it from our mouth but leave it on the table, but we have not accomplished much of anything to please our wives.

One of the other issues we discussed with the parsha is how Abraham prays for the Sodomites, but does not pray for his own descendants. Hashem tells Abraham that his own descendants will be held captive for 400 years, but Abraham seems a lot more concerned for the Sodomites.   David commented that sometimes going through something “bad” can lead us to something “good”.  In the case of going to Egypt, the slavery and captivity lead towards our freedom and receiving the Torah. Sometimes we need to hit a bottom in order to reach new heights, whether as an individual or as a nation.

Norm commented on how human beings tend to react to threats.  We either fight, flight, or freeze. We may be born with a tendency to do one of these, whereas someone else is born with a tendency to do something else.  David talked more about the virtuous response to suffering, which is why Hashem designed the world to have threats to being with.  Although we may have a tendency to fight, flight, or freeze, Norm commented that it may be possible to train ourselves to react differently.  I personally thought my tendency was towards flight but after our discussion I think I may have a tendency to freeze as well.

This Shabbos we reflected back on earlier portions of the Torah and the Garden of Eden. Adam and Eve had everything they could possibly want, but were told to not take from a particular tree. Being told they could not have this, they focused on it intently.

Norm commented that human beings have this psychological tendency to focus on, and desire what they can’t have. Norm discussed a specific study that was done in which undergraduate college students are put into 2 separated groups. In the first group, the students are told to not think about white bears. In the second group, the students are not told anything. The individuals in both groups are then told to use a device to count how often they think of white bears. The individuals in the group told not to think of white bears, indicate that they actually think of white bears significantly more often than the group that wasn’t told anything.

David commented how his father, HaRav Natan Ben HaRav Shmuel (aka Dr. George N Schlesinger) would say the challenge in life is to want what we have, rather than to have what we want. There is a great lesson in this, that we should be grateful and not take things for granted. We discussed how although it may seem that Hashem created us and many things happen automatically, Hashem is continuously part of our life. Hashem is not like a CEO or king that only manages overriding principles. Hashem takes an active role in the details of the lives of all the billions of his creations. We need to be grateful for even the small things we take for granted every day, like being able to wake up, have food, breath, etc. etc.

Finally, we discussed the section of Rabbi Malamed’s books concerning the prayer of Gomel. Ashkenazi jews say this prayer whenever we escape danger to our lives. An example, would be an accident in which we survive. Another example would be if we engage in a risky activity, and are lucky enough to make it through. Sephardic Jews only say the prayer in very specific circumstances, such as when surviving the crossing of the dessert or sea, or being released from prison.

This is a summary of what we discussed.  No Halachic rulings are intended or should be inferred.

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